I hope that 4 days into the new year, everything is going excellent for everyone. So far it’s been a blast for me, including a nice visit to the ER for having a sore throat covered in some disgusting ick that when the doctor saw it, promptly backed away and ordered me to have a shot in my ass.
I have decided this year to not make any resolutions, but I intend to make this year as amazing as humanly possible. I have so much to look forward to, and I will have my wonderful friends at my side taking the journey with me. One of the things I am most looking forward to is seeing more of the world… seeing more of this country I live in. I am heading off to Vegas, DC, NY, the Caribbean and so much more this year. I am excited!
So here’s to 2011!! Bring it on!
For the past several months I have been going through some pretty personal stuff.
And then this past week every bit of possible shit that could hit the fan did.
And for the first time in my life, I can honestly say I am lost.
I, the so-called “rock” in all of my friendships, can barely find the will to get dressed everyday.
The depth of the pain I am feeling right now can not be described by words. It’s a loss that I didn’t think I could experience until one of my parents passed away. It’s a loss of so many things… friendship, trust, understanding…
… Love…
…and so much more.
And while I suffer, people laugh. They high five. They seem to be somewhat rejoicing in the fact that I am physically and emotionally hurting.
I know at times I can be a bitch, but I could never do what is blatantly being done to me to someone else. The saddest part is, they aren’t strangers to me. So it’s like, you know me and are reveling in my pain?
I am constantly searching my brain, and my heart… my soul to understand what I may have done in life to ever deserve this. I can find no answers.
But clearly it’s happening to me for a reason.
One of the things I honestly enjoy doing is writing my blog, as well as reading the blogs of others. I haven’t been able to do either in what feels like forever. I guess I shouldn’t be complaining since I am busy doing other things I love.
Since returning from my cruise I have been running around doing Labor and Delivery photography. I ABSOLUTELY love it. It’s been so crazy… but really rewarding. The only downfall is that you never quite know when a baby is going to show up, and lucky for me, the ones I have been photographing have either been preemies or waaaaayyyy overdue. I am hoping that the next 10 have a slightly more predictable arrival.
I really love taking pictures… more than I ever imagined possible. I love that it is something that brings me joy as well as the person on the other side of the lens. So, with that in mind I have decided to just go full force with it and make my business grow. And that is essentially what I have been doing for the past month. In fact, between trying to be there for births and preparing to relaunch my business I haven’t even remotely sorted through my cruise pictures!
So if you don’t already know I have a flickr account I dump a lot of stuff onto, my Pictures of Blank blog, my Pictures of Blank facebook fan page , my Pictures of Blank gallery where you can purchase images as I slowly upload them and an email list that you can join to receive our newsletter which includes cool discounts and information! So there you have it!
I guess now that I have gotten all of that in order, I can finally work on those cruise pictures everyone is still waiting to see.
I just spent almost two weeks cruising New England while dodging hurricane Earl. It was lovely and fun and fun and lovely. I took way too many pics and now that I am back home I am having to deal with that… but I am not complaining (much). I’ve got to get my memories somehow. So as soon as I come up from air from that project I will post all about it.
Many moons ago after going through some crap with life and not having a clue what I wanted to do, I decided the best way to figure out what to do next was to throw some darts at a map and just move there.
At first I was scared and not sure if I was just a nutcase, but I went with it anyway. I got a map of the US and threw three darts. The plan was to move to the one that was farthest away.
I ended up moving to Wisconsin and loving it. It was amazing. Best decision of my life.
I discovered myself, discovered food, discovered a man didn’t have to hit me to show he loved me and I discovered freedom.
It’s been an amazing 20 years.
So now I am settled into the good life and enjoying being self-employed. I am a photographer for those who don’t know and as much as I love taking pictures of nature I am going to venture into studio photography. It’s something I have been struggling with for a while now because I wasn’t sure if I would ‘lose myself’ and veer away from what I really love doing.
I think I have finally found a solution to that problem. I am once again seeking help from a map and this time instead of relocating my whole life to somewhere new, I am going to visit somewhere different each weekend. In the process I can learn new things about North Texas because after 3 years, I still don’t care for it much.
Hopefully I can balance both projects and find true happiness here in the greater Dallas area.
Posted in All Work, No Play, Life As I Know It
Tags: changes, dreams, goals, happiness, maps, north texas, path, photography, work
On Sunday it was 105° here in North Texas. The weather fellas said it felt like 112° or higher. I was content staying in doors and enjoying the lovely air conditioning.
And then a fuse blew somewhere and the neighborhood experienced a blackout. Soooooo, we decided to hop in the car and go find some ducks to feed some stale bread to. It was meant to be a quick trip because I had no desire to be out in the heat. Plus I figured everyone else would be hiding out inside as well right?
WRONG!
We arrived to the park and saw more people than I have ever seen before out on a Sunday. Were these people crazy? Had the heat affected their common sense? Were they in some parallel universe where it was 78° for them? What was going on?
There were people on benches in jeans.
There were people bicycling.
People were taking pictures in the hot sun… in ALL black!
People playing volleyball.
People jogging.
Parents trying to melt their small children.
I was shocked. And honestly, watching all of them move around was making me even hotter. Like WUTTTTT!?!?!?! There were even people golfing, playing softball and horseshoes. Who does that?!?!?!?!
I figured it was best I go home because I certainly didn’t want to get bit by the crazy heat bug that was going around. I’ve been sick enough these past few weeks without adding something else to the list.
Do you go out in the heat and do vigorous exercise?
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