In my 30 something years on this planet1 I have never plucked, tweezed, waxed, “razored” or even combed my eyebrows. They are just these two bushy things on my forehead that people have always complimented me on… why I don’t know. As a child, the church ladies would ask my mother who was plucking her daughter brows. My mom would constantly have to tell them they were natural, and she would never allow her teen daughter to do that.
As I got older, I began to take pride and great joy that I didn’t have to do anything with my eyebrows. I have watched my mother have hers done, and it looked like she was enduring great suffrage for it. Yeah, no thanks. My best friends also have theirs done and as usual it never looks like it’s a good time. Ever.
However… this year I had begun to notice that my eyebrows were getting a little thicker… a little bushier. I had hairs going in directions I didn’t like. Something like a uni-brow was beginning to form and that also was making me a little anxious. For the first time ever, I used that little comb/brush thing that comes with most make-up sets. But even that wasn’t doing it for me.
A Solution
In the mall, they have this booth where three Indian ladies stand offering eyebrow threading.2 I would often walk by to see if the clients were being tormented, or maybe had to be given a local anesthetic to endure the pain that comes with having their hair ripped from its follicles. But, I have never once seen any of the women look even slightly uncomfortable.
So, I began to ask my husband what he thought. Maybe I too should give in to the trend and finally have my eyebrows professionally done.3 Of course, as usual he said he would support me regardless of what I decided. Oh, he also mentioned that they might ruin the shape, make me look like a freak, destroy the natural look of my eyebrows or even completely screw them up so I would never want to leave the house again.
Of course, since he was so encouraging I decided to go ahead and try it. It took me walking past the place 5-6 times before I got up the nerve, but then FINALLY, I sat my ass down and did it.
Bring the Pain
After she motioned for me to sit, she reclined my seat so that I was looking straight up in the air. This is not exactly the position you want to take in the middle of a busy mall. Then she asked me to hold my eye and forehead. I wasn’t exactly sure what she was wanting so she ended up positioning my hands for me. I really hope I did not look as ridiculous as I felt.
And then she began. I could hear her tearing the thread with her teeth and then off she went… attacking my eyebrows as though she was trimming some out of control hedges. She moved super fast, like a cheetah on crack.
It did not feel pleasant… it was not nice. It hurt like holy hell and I really wanted to punch her in the face.
And then it was over. She handed me a mirror and said “You done.”
The Results
The afterburn sucked. She was so kind as to rub alcohol all over it which just made the burning turn into stinging. I looked like someone had exfoliated my face, with little bits of skin and hair all over my nose which was really gross. But it looked good. She did kind of what I wanted, which was to clean up the excess hair I was growing. She did especially well on my babyfuzz uni-brow so I was quite happy about that.
When I got home and got a close look, I noticed she over-trimmed my left eyebrow, but no one else noticed other than RoRo.4
Overall I am pleased. Ten dollars for a 2 minute session is pretty worth it… considering that threading is far less painful than me personally trying to yank them out with some tweezers. I might actually make this a part of my regular beauty routine.
